SpecialRaptor, there are a lot of words I use or try to use instead of using said (I never used replies, but I have used replied on several occasions). Plenty, and it mostly depends on what emotion I want to express, how the character behaves, or even what the character is. Like for instance, I use growled, snarled, hissed, squawked, roared, screeched and so on for creature characters along with other normal means I use.

~

*brings in a character for reference*

“Like Nightfall, the Troodon from Journey.” I say. Nightfall screeches in Argentavis as he stamps his claws.

“Come on Apex!!! I was just about to eat some nice Morellotops BBQ!!!” Nightfall hissed. I roll my eyes at the overdramatic creature.

“Look, I’m just bringing you here as an example to show someone how I write my stories like what words to add after a character speaks. And how I write characters and to explain that it’s really up to the person to decide how they want to write.”

“Oh… well, sorry for snapping.” Nightfall said. There was an awkward silence between me and Nightfall as we sat in the white void.

“Well, have you told this person yet that you can also just not add any extra word dialogue if two characters are involved a longer a deeper discussion between two characters?” Nightfall suggested. I shook my head.

“No, I was going to get to that though.”

“Well, you might tell this person that you should always make sure that you mention the person who speaks in the unclaimed dialogue prior to the dialogue occurring.” Nightfall added. I nodded my head as he said this.

“Yes, I’ll make sure I say that.” There was another moment of silence as both sat there.

“So, when is the next Journey chapter coming out.” Nightfall asked.

“I dunno yet. Maybe in a couple weeks.” I answered. Nightfall looked at me like I killed someone.

“A COUPLE WEEKS!!” Nightfall growled. “It’s already been a few months!!” He screeched. I rolled my eyes and sighed.

“I’ve got writer’s block, okay? I gotta break through it before I can write anything.” I said. He looked at me with a disappointed look.

“But everyone’s waiting on what happens next, AND THE READERS WANT TO SEE MORE OF ME!!!” Nightfall squawked. I glared at him. Nightfall just grinned back.

“Why don’t you ever write me like this in Journey?”

“Alright, time for you to go.” I said. Nightfall’s eyes widened.

“Now hold on. Wait just a second! I—”

“Nope, no more seconds…” I interject as I send Nightfall back to where he belongs.

~

Anyway, that’s kind of how I write a creature in my creature based story. But I also use a bunch more. And plenty more for human POV stories too. I use words like shouted, screamed, cackled, chuckled, groaned, moaned, yelled, whispered, whimpered, cried, lashed out, retorted and a lot more. I also use adjectives added onto said like “said arrogantly” and so on. Or you can always add an action with it. Like “he said continuing to look for the diamond ring” and “she said gritting her teeth.”.

For sprucing up your story, maybe just describing more around the characters. Or even describe the characters a bit. If we’re reading from Troop’s POV. Describe Ziggy and how he looks or visa versa. Or small features of each of them.

Or when describing time differences, you don don’t have to add parentheses. Like instead of (The scene is no longer daytime, welcoming the night), write—

As Ziggy searches the Redwood forest, time passes quicker than it seemed to be. With minutes becoming hours. Without even realizing it, Ziggy found himself in dark but comforting arms of the night.

It says the same thing, but it goes more into describing. And you can take it further too. But again, most of this is my opinion. Writing is an art style and everyone has their own unique perspective and way to write. And I’m probably not the best writer to give advice. Ben is a great writer who can probably give a lot more tips if you need them.

Honestly, your story isn’t bad plot wise do far, or even poorly written. The word “said” is one of those words that is kinda vital of having a lot of in a story. But it sounds repetitive. I’ve already seen you use a lot of alternative words for said though in chapter one. So the most I can say is just try to avoid using the word “then” outside of dialogue itself. Always make sure the story can be read easily and understood by the reader, take a few steps in their shoes as you write. And just try to make your chapters bigger if you can. You don’t have to, most of the time writing will gradually get longer as you get more and more acclimated to writing. And if you read other people’s stories or even author’s books. That can help you understand what you should do in situations you’re having trouble with.

But, so far, you’re doing just fine SpecialRaptor!!! Also, I’d suggest using Grammarly if you are worried about Grammar and punctuation. I use it to go over my drafts and I read along and even change by adding or removing scenes from my chapters as I correct any grammatical mistakes.

Anyway, I think that’s it for now.

Until Next Time!!!

-PrimalApex:)