Dododex

ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion

Question

What are some funny jokes or stories about the megalodon? Funny megalodon jokes submitted by ARK players.

score 19 · Answer 1 · 2019-11-01T03:49:17+00:00

When one toe gets put into the water

Megladon: umiwamou mo shindio

Me:NANI

score 16 · Answer 2 · 2020-07-21T20:37:05+00:00

For all those people requesting buff for them,the ocean is full of them just as the river is full of piranhas.And you still want to supercharge them?

score 14 · Answer 3 · 2021-01-08T06:59:24+00:00

Why do they drop berries?

Ocean berries?

All I have to say.

-Venatrix.

score 23 · Answer 4 · 2017-09-06T12:52:13+00:00

Scavengers of the waters crow of the sea these will eat so swim baby please!

score 15 · Answer 5 · 2020-06-27T12:27:30+00:00

For some reason a giant fish can attack your raft but not a pack of giant sharks or like 6 or 7 piranha or Cnidaria come and stun you but no MEGALODONS FOR WOME REASON CSNT ATTACK RAFTS!

it wont let me say the u word

score 2 · Answer 6 · 2025-04-11T02:14:50+00:00

Smaller than I thought. WAY smaller than I thought.lol

score 8 · Answer 7 · 2023-01-08T18:58:33+00:00

Get one of these, kill a person with it at night, have someone find the person's body at morning, kill two more people with it, one by one, get a boat, unclaim it and shoot it with two people from the boat until it Dies. Congrats, you have recreated JAWS!

score 17 · Answer 8 · 2019-07-26T20:51:32+00:00

Hey, that's the thing from the movie

"The Meg"

score 1 · Answer 9 · 2025-08-26T18:50:12+00:00

Me: I guess I’ll just go swimming across the lake to catch that parasaur. (Enters the water and sees a meg: oh, shit! (Dies to piranhas)

score 8 · Answer 10 · 2022-12-24T16:08:48+00:00

we’re gonna need a bigger fishing rod.

score 13 · Answer 11 · 2021-01-07T23:55:52+00:00

We’re gonna need a bigger boat...........

score 7 · Answer 12 · 2023-04-05T22:34:18+00:00

What the heck is that photo that thing gives me nightmares

score 12 · Answer 13 · 2021-03-03T01:19:59+00:00

Currently typing this in the middle of the ocean surrounded by lvl 150 megs Ark gods pls help me.

score 4 · Answer 14 · 2024-05-21T12:05:42+00:00

So, I was swimming off shore with my icthy, and suddenly I spot this fat orange glowy thing. Little did I know, this was an alpha meg. In short, I ended up running for my life, because this thing could somehow KEEP UP with my icthy. If the devs are listening, please make the alpha so that is doesn’t spot you from flipping TEN MILES AWAY!!!

score 7 · Answer 15 · 2023-02-18T12:13:57+00:00

Congratulations! your Coelacanth evolved into a Megalodon!

score 5 · Answer 16 · 2023-11-05T14:48:23+00:00

Hug it. It just wants a hug. It wont kill you. Very passive

score 12 · Answer 17 · 2020-10-22T13:06:19+00:00

Megs are crazy but don't be dumb and die

score 13 · Answer 18 · 2020-05-12T22:02:21+00:00

This thing looks like a grandparent even when it just open up its egg

score 8 · Answer 19 · 2022-06-26T00:14:25+00:00

Shark is what you want(search shark 👁👄👁)

score 9 · Answer 20 · 2022-01-11T02:24:12+00:00

Me: just chilling in the water. Meg’s be like: 👀👀👀👀👀👁👁. Me sees meg: 🤔 “am I gonna die?”