An Ovis, a drum and a Titanoboa fall into a Canyon.


Baah-Dum-Tss

1. Go to a swamp
2. Feed it fertilized eggs
3. Have fun
4. Realize you're unconscious at step 1

So one time I was looking for a female Sarco so I can get a imprinted Sarco, well I was walking around the swamp when I hear the slither slither of a snake, it hits me but I kill it, knowing that one hit from a Titanoboas can knock me out (low torpor), I run to the swamp beach but I fall asleep, and my otter falls off, I was waiting to wake up but hear the slither of a snake, knowing I was going to die, I prayed that somehow my otter (Oscar) was going to live, he didn’t, 1 like=1 F for oscar

I think when I see them I think they say……YES!!!!

*human oh noes ima ded
*tb knocks out human
*pulls out cooked meat
*tames human

Why the hell are snakes still not tameable on fear evolved

I have had it with these motherf***ing snakes, on this motherf***ing plane!

Imagine if ark added a saddle to the Titanoboa that was the length of its body and could fit multiple passengers, it would be like arks bus “-“ :)

This guy is in a lot of boxing movies, plays a character called "Rocky Titanoboa"

There's a joke here why you can't tame them. You can't be friends with a snake. A snake is someone who uses your friendship for their own personal gains. I'm talking about you Jacob

*first time playing*
"OH SHIT OH SHIT RUNNNNN"

*100 in game days later*
*on a Rex*
"Oh hey lil snaky come here u lil fucker gimme yo prime meat"

So let me get this straight , we can ride a headbutt boi, a coward seal looking thing (moschops) and we can ride a spider... why cant we ride a Literal oversized giant snake that has so much venom that it can ko you in 1 shot and living at the most dangerous places

Titanoboa’s, prehistoric giant snake that ISN’T venomous. Titanoboa on ark, venomous.
Me who knows a lot about snakes: le what

Evolution: dilo-titanoboa-poison wyvern

Woodie in cartoons: i've got a snake in my boot
Woodie in ARK: i've got a titanoboa in my boot

Pro with noob in cave: a titan boa! Don’t move!
Noob: Kay
Me: slowly backs away and and runs away
Also me: haha bah saves me a bola!
Noob: Nono don’t kill me snakes! Take my fert eggs!
Also noob: I tamed them all with me eggs, but they still is chasing me!!
Me: there following u u idiot there tamed
Noob: Kay! Snakes freinds!
Me: yea snakes freinds
Noob: snakes! Snakes! Snakeys! Yay snakes!
Me: umm should we go to base now
Noob: yes snakes freinds come to base!
Me: ummm
Noob: they my first pets
Me: ok
Noob*yay snakes* ( whisper)
Me: dude!!

Punch in the face and youre going to die
Killed by a giant noodle

*Titanoboa* AHHH A HUMAN" *Human* "AHHHH A SNAKE" *Dodo* "AHHH A SNAKE AND A HUMAN"

This is a dilo imposter it has a drill and spits poison ⬆️

Feed them unborn children, and they’ll be you best friend. Damn, that sounds really bad