An Ovis, a drum and a Titanoboa fall into a Canyon.


Baah-Dum-Tss

So, I killed 9 of these glorified anacondas in 15 minutes. This is how I did it.

Me: HEY GIANT SNAKE HEAD, COME AT ME
Titanoboa: sssssstupid noob
Me: We’ll see about that

2 seconds later..........

Game: You killed a level 25 Titanoboa.

Went to the swamp at lvl 23 (bad idea), took my new bestie, Pete The Parasaur, long-story short he dies, (Sarco) I avenge him, Later I come back at lvl 32 and think “I’ve got you now”, to those snakes 🐍, LSS, 7 of em slither out of the water and all I can think of Is Big ol’ Shrek, Screaming in my ear:
!!“GET OOT A ME SWAMP”!!

*human oh noes ima ded
*tb knocks out human
*pulls out cooked meat
*tames human

Imagine if ark added a saddle to the Titanoboa that was the length of its body and could fit multiple passengers, it would be like arks bus “-“ :)

Why the hell are snakes still not tameable on fear evolved

I have had it with these motherf***ing snakes, on this motherf***ing plane!

I met a titanaboa it was stuck in a rock so I nocked it out and tamed it🤣😂😂😂🤣

There's a joke here why you can't tame them. You can't be friends with a snake. A snake is someone who uses your friendship for their own personal gains. I'm talking about you Jacob

Let's go to the swamp!
(2 minutes later) "I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERF#CKING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHERF#CKING SWAMP!"

*first time playing*
"OH SHIT OH SHIT RUNNNNN"

*100 in game days later*
*on a Rex*
"Oh hey lil snaky come here u lil fucker gimme yo prime meat"

I love how a arachnid can be ridden with those twiggy legs but a large snake made out of muscle can't be ridden

Punch in the face and youre going to die
Killed by a giant noodle

*Titanoboa* AHHH A HUMAN" *Human* "AHHHH A SNAKE" *Dodo* "AHHH A SNAKE AND A HUMAN"

Soo here’s a little thought : there should be some sort of tek gun the player could mount on the snake BUT not a saddle because that’d be weird but anyway, you cou have them on wander with a few max diameter Dino leash thing or whatever they’re called but anyway, they are on wander and they protect your base for all the idiots that want to storm you base or just the occasional dodo or something.
That’s all I have to say but
UPDOOT if you agree with this and it should be in the game

Tried to find one in the swamp but couldn’t but when I just want to explore they are everywhere and they usually ko me and I die

Snakes... why did I have to be snakes?

Oops I spilled my spaghetti and my radioactive sauce on my pet dilo

So I walked in the swamp trying to tame one and YEET! Snapped and dead

I went into the swamps with my dilo army. Died to this boi. My army is still stranded somewhere, probably ded. As soon as I get saddle for my pterodactyl, I’m launching a search party.