What are some funny jokes or stories about the titanoboa? Funny titanoboa jokes submitted by ARK players.
Like all snakes there’s nothing a good shotgun shell can’t fix.
I tried to be it's friend and touch him but he raped me and my mum
CaLlInG aLl SnEkK fANs
If any of you find a white one of these I’m begging u pls name it Orochimaru.
Me: How dangerous can the swamp really be??
Titanoboa: hold my ascendant beer
Me: ok, i can land here to regain stam on my pteranodon
Big snake: Hello
Me and my pteranodon : buy buy have a nice tiiiime!
*accidentally lands in redwoods and dies*
I have had soooo many close calls
Hey what is that over there let me check it ou-*curious George has died to a titanoboa
Ok ok ok, how come they attack anything they see thats made out of meat and they only eat eggs to tame!?
Love how it says "can be found in the dark caves of the island" and then I saw one jump off a cliff and then it climbed back up to kill me and then it died.wonderful
I love how a arachnid can be ridden with those twiggy legs but a large snake made out of muscle can't be ridden
Let's go to the swamp!
(2 minutes later) "I'VE HAD IT WITH THESE MOTHERF#CKING SNAKES IN THIS MOTHERF#CKING SWAMP!"
Real men eat these eggs for breakfast
Why isn't this tameable? Even a dodo isn't stupid enough to be tamed. Ark Logic
Why the hell is this thing so small irl titanoboa was 47 ft long and probably ate crocodiles and we have this tiny ass thing that only eats eggs and has venom… titanoboa is a constrictor like boas or pythons … it’s literally in the name
Pro with noob in cave: a titan boa! Don’t move!
Me: slowly backs away and and runs away
Also me: haha bah saves me a bola!
Noob: Nono don’t kill me snakes! Take my fert eggs!
Also noob: I tamed them all with me eggs, but they still is chasing me!!
Me: there following u u idiot there tamed
Noob: Kay! Snakes freinds!
Me: yea snakes freinds
Noob: snakes! Snakes! Snakeys! Yay snakes!
Me: umm should we go to base now
Noob: yes snakes freinds come to base!
Noob: they my first pets
Noob*yay snakes* ( whisper)
If you’re in lvl 7 (DO NOT GO NEAR)
i did try DID NOT GO WELL
These are eggcelent for knocking other dinos out! Ok I will admit that was a bad joke
Feed them unborn children, and they’ll be you best friend. Damn, that sounds really bad
Oops I spilled my spaghetti and my radioactive sauce on my pet dilo