To tame a reaper you have to let it...... Impregnate you..
Reaper
The Reaper King and Queen are creatures in Ark: Aberration.
Jokes and funny moments about the Reaper from ARK players.
Lead dev: “Okay, we need some dinosaur taming strategies”
Dec 1: “Feeding it literal buildings”
Dev 2: “Giving dead corpses of your pets to it”
Dec 3: “Having it impregnate you”
All: “Wait wha-“
Dev 2: “what the frick were you watching?”
Dec 4:…
Lead dev: “Okay, we need some dinosaur taming strategies”
Dec 1: “Feeding it literal buildings”
Dev 2: “Giving dead corpses of your pets to it”
Dec 3: “Having it impregnate you”
All: “Wait wha-“
Dev 2: “what the frick were you watching?”
Dec 4: “How about we stick to normal taming strategies?”
lead dev: “Your fired”
“Yeah bro the dog don’t bite”
The 200 ton undiscovered UNIT of a dog in question:
-SomeGamerGuy, for all of you fanfiction geeks. (I’m one too don’t worry)
The question isn't: How strong can we make a reaper army? It's: Aight, who's gonna get impregnated?
Dev1 Let’s make a new creature for aberration
Dev2 Ok tell me more
Dev1 Ok make it like a rex
Dev2 Ok
Dev1 And you know the movie aliens make it like that also
Dev2 You sure?
Dev1 Ok now make it that there are queens and kings
Dev2 Umm ok
Dev1 Make them…
Dev1 Let’s make a new creature for aberration
Dev2 Ok tell me more
Dev1 Ok make it like a rex
Dev2 Ok
Dev1 And you know the movie aliens make it like that also
Dev2 You sure?
Dev1 Ok now make it that there are queens and kings
Dev2 Umm ok
Dev1 Make them genderless
Dev2 But there are kin…
Dev1 Shush let me focus. Throw the queens in the red zone
Dev2 (doubtfully) Ok
Dev1 Now put the kings up at the surface
Dev2 You sure man
Dev1 Yup. Now make them have armour that makes them basically invincible
Dev2 Are you sure abo…
Dev1 And make it so to tame you have to get a queen below 10% of its max health so it can impregnate you with its child
Dev2 Umm ok
Dev1 Now make it so you have to gain seventy five levels while its is still in your survivor
Dev2 Is that it?
Dev1 yup now show me my creation
Dev2 Are you sure your ready for it
Dev1 Yup for sure
Dev2 Ok I’m calling it the Reaper
Bulbpet: I ran out of battery
Me:ok we'll stop here.
Reaper queen: hello,
How are you?
It just impregnates you and leaves you. It’s a gold digger.
I didn't recall asking to be a surrogate father when I woke up this morning.
Once you go reaper you cant go deeper.
Now kids, I’m going to tell you about the “facts of life...”
It looks like your sister saying "IT'S MY TURN ON THE XBOX"
I got a pink reaper named toast.
Me:I'm going to get a rock Drake.
Reaper:No,your getting a child!
Me:Help!
Everyone on the server:Did y'all hear something?
Me:*makes a entire room for the birth*
Me:Still help!
*Reaper jumps out of my chest*
*Goes back to the cave*
Me:Miss reaper queen,can…
Me:I'm going to get a rock Drake.
Reaper:No,your getting a child!
Me:Help!
Everyone on the server:Did y'all hear something?
Me:*makes a entire room for the birth*
Me:Still help!
*Reaper jumps out of my chest*
*Goes back to the cave*
Me:Miss reaper queen,can you pay for chi-
*Kills me and I respawn at base*
Reaper baby:Hello mortal.
Me:Hello ankle bitter.
Reaper baby: ...
Reaper baby:Excuse me?!.
My friend:Ooo can I ride it?
Me: I guess.
My friend:*Kills it*
Me:Noooo ankle bitter!
-Thylcolo huntress,thanks for reading this I had much fun and I hope you have the same!R.i.p ankle bitter my reaper.
Ok… ok… so the original form of taming in ark was to knock something out and shove food in its mouth (Like for raptors), then there is stealing the egg (like for wyverns), both of these im cool with. But this… this is… well… someone at wildcard wasn’t totally sane…
Ok… ok… so the original form of taming in ark was to knock something out and shove food in its mouth (Like for raptors), then there is stealing the egg (like for wyverns), both of these im cool with. But this… this is… well… someone at wildcard wasn’t totally sane when thinking of this.😐😑
Bro It’s a giant alien creature that can jump,screams,and rapes you. What’s next Wild Card
Me:I am going to fly on my new lightning wyv today
Reaper queen:hello
Me:hi?
Reaper queen:time for your new kid
Me:can you at least pay chi-
Reaper already gone to do it with another unfortunate person
Fastest way to loose your virginity
IT CAN JUMP!?!?!?!? I'm sorry WHAT?
Y does it give u its son and DOES NOT GIVE CHILD SUPPORT
Me at max level: Alright! Time to obliterate this queen!
Reaper Queen:COME HERE
Me:why?
Reaper Queen: LEMME INPREGNATE YOU!!!!!
Me:oh s-
*1 day later*
Tribemate:hey bro did u feed the baby
Me:I fed him like half my meat
Tribemate:btw how did u get him
Me:……………y…
Me at max level: Alright! Time to obliterate this queen!
Reaper Queen:COME HERE
Me:why?
Reaper Queen: LEMME INPREGNATE YOU!!!!!
Me:oh s-
*1 day later*
Tribemate:hey bro did u feed the baby
Me:I fed him like half my meat
Tribemate:btw how did u get him
Me:……………you don’t wanna know