"When half dead, remember to turn the tables and rape your opponent" -Reaper Queen

I think I got too attached to my Reaper. When it was born I built an entire room for it complete with a tiny makeshift crib and blue wood walls. I cherished everyday with it and when I lost it to a level 175 Crab while I was tripping out on mushrooms I invited the whole god damned server to a funeral
(Oh and afterwards we had a feast and guess what was on the menu, Crab)
- The one and only HazmatGaming209

Once the reaper queen impregnated me I was thinking if I wanted a boy or a girl popping out of my mangina

So does it pay child support or...?

I spawn in the "easiest" area and i walk a litte and what do you know i get raped by a reaper king and some nameless!

Pain isn't weakness leaving the body.

Pain is your newly acquired mutant child bursting through your chest as it's form of birth.

And I thought human pregnancies were terrifying

when your playing with your friends and hear a loud scream and then a death message

Literally you get raped
-Bonerat

This goes through a reaper queens head" oh I'm about to die. I'll get this persion pregnent!"

To tame it has to impregnate you, nice ark

Reaper queen, more like raper queen.

I wonder where the inspiration for this came from...

It's sad knowing that the only children I'll ever have are giant radioactive lizards that were the result of another adult giant radioactive lizard queen raping me.

Oh, and there are no painkillers for this kind of pregnancy. There are no hands to break and you can't blame the impregnater because she's several thousand feet underground laughing at the pain you are going through.

This thing knocked me up and didn't even buy me dinner first...

Swiggity Swooty,gonna shove an alien baby up our booty

Person: A Reaper Queen and I had sex

Me: What do you mean you both had sex? At best she had sex with you

To tame a reaper you have to let it...... Impregnate you..

Me: yes, I will finally stack my XP by killing this reaper queen!
Me thinking: ( she is at 1/4 heath, lemme get my magnifying glass and make sure.
(Gets really close)
Me: okay here we go
Reaper queen: Oh yes child come here I have a gift for u
Me: what did u say
Reaper queen: COME CLOSER CHILD
Me: what.. what.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Reaper queen: YOU WILL HAVE MY CHILD!
5 year later
Me: Honey, I’m back. OH MY GOD, COOLDUD63 HOW COULD YOU!! HOW MANY OTHER PLAYERS HAVE YOU IMPREGNATED QUEEN
Reaper queen: The entire server
10 years later
Me: queen I need the child support, we’re struggling here
Lol please up this so everybody can see, I worked hard on this, thx 4 reading

I didn't recall asking to be a surrogate father when I woke up this morning.