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Yarg I’m a pirate and here be my pet monkey *monkey throws poop at the person I’m talking to* other guy:hey why did you throw poop pirate it’s nasty

Me: it was not me it’s my monkey he on aggressive sorry

Other guy: no excuses your under arrest and so is your monkey

Well after a long time in jail the monkey swipes a guards keys and frees me and him

Me:where free

Monkey:yep

Guard chokes on poop thrown by the monkey 🤣😂😭🤣😂😭🤣😂😭🤣😂😭

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