I once had one called scruffy, scruffy was a great pet, I put night_vision goggles on him and he looked so cute!!! Then one day I was just going around killing raptors and tickle chickens when I saw a Rex so as usual I got my shotgun and shot the Rex however I only had one shot and I thought i was done for but then Duh duh duh!!!! Scruffy started throwing crap at the Rex I then saw at the bottom of the screen your scruffy level 27 mesopitheicus killed a level 12 Rex 😆 🤣 😂 I then Renamed him scruffy the Rex slayer but sadly scruffy got cocky and thought he could kill all rexes may he forever rest in peace 1 👆=1 heart for scruffy -DARKSTAR

He protecc

He attacc but most importantly he use

Poo fling attacc

bro I just found a female that was getting attacked by a dildo so I picked her up with my argy, after I exited the game to play sum music, came back picked her back up and brought her to my base, made 2 dodo kibbl, equipped my camo set, and slept cuz it was really dark out, then I went over to the tiny monke, opened the window to the box she was in and gave her a dodo kibbl.

And I swear this monkey committed harakiri cause just as I tamed it I got the message right in front of a snail that I totally did not kidnap from its natural environment to put inside a "prison" according to that dead monkey, to make achinta paste for me cause I don't have big bee honey😭😭.

I swear that monkey was giving the snail ideas on how to get out of the pris- I mean very comfortable wooden box😂😂😂.

But like how did she die cause she was gonna be a mate for cj, a male monkey that's chillin inside of my house, also, how do I get big bee honey?

-slider

Fun Fact of the Day: did you know that when bees make honey they do mouth to mouth with each other which makes it thicker cause 1 bee doesn't have enough saliva to turn it into honey, and they'll beat their wings to make it harden. Do whatever you want with that information. This was, Fun Fact of the Day with your host: slider

(I learnt this☝️on insta btw)

Enjoy the rest of your day. 😎👋👋

Reject humanity

Become monke…

His name was Daniel.

Raptor attack.

Daniel the second.

Drowning.

Darwin the third.

Accidental ballistic trauma.

Darwin the fourth.

Fell through the map.

Darwin the fifth.

Lost, yet never found.

Jack.

Tamed in 2016 and still have him alive as of march the 5th 2018.

Don't name your monkey Darwin.

"If you've got poo flick it now" - Madagascar the original.

Players: if only there was a turret you could hold on your shoulder

This guy: hold my s**t

Once I was playing ark with a friend and he had one on his shoulder. A carno jumped out of nowhere and killed both of us, so we ran to get our loot and tames. When we came back we found a dead carno and the monkey just sitting there. THE MONKEY KILLED A CARNO

Reject humanity

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