Friend: may I pet your lizard? Me: sure you can.

Friend: Oh awesome he's so scaly and big!

Me : Oh wait he has rabbies.

Friend: WWWHHHHHAAAAAAATTTT why would you let me pet him?

Me: it's funny.

Friend:ok bud that's enough.

Text message from rabbies to friend: Your highly contagious of Mega Rabies!

Friend: WHAT what is MEGA RABIES?

Megalania: (after Friend dies of mega rabies) hey Friend mind of you say hello to my friends onyc and titanoboa?

Friend: sure..... oh hello onyc and titanoboa!

Onyc and titanoboa: HI WhAtS Up???? Here's this paper.

Friend: *reads it* We will gladly reun your day!! (They can't spell good) what those ruen mean?

Onyc and titanoboa: YoU FeLl InTo ArE TrAp.,.¡!!!¡

Friend: What?

Titanoboa: nom

Onyc: nom nom nom

Friend : (fell asleep and has mega rabbies) "bruh"

Arthropluera: spits (breaks all his flak armor)

Friend: noooooooooooooooooo.

Araono (don't know how to spell it let's just call it spider)

Spider: guys step back I can finish the job.

Friend: Is that a giant spider? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Spider: 😋 delicious.

Me: 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

This things is harmless! (Now it’s biting ur hand off)

Don’t worry, this is just my pet gecko

Lystro disliked being everyone’s first tamed and first slaughtered so it evolved into a almost useless giant lizard who should be an early game tame seeing how easy it is to tame but you get its saddle at level 70 by then I had a giga I couldn’t even use but my wyvern came in packs

So that's where my pet lizard went!

This is what started coronavirus

I wouldn't recommend using these to farm meat, it got me some nasty food poisoning

Bro it’s an evil moschops.

Spider-Man got nothing on this guy

Why can a kapro carry a jacked up cancer lizard

I MEAN PTERANODONS CANT EVEN PICK UP A MOSCHOP AND PICK A THING TWICE AS BIG AS A MOSCHOPS. I MEAN JUST LOOK AT THE PTERANODONS LEGS!!!

A Komodo dragon on steroids.

I’m thinking about starting a mega rabies epidemic on my cluster by just spreading it around all the servers

Is it just me or do I call it Megalavania?

Gecko from Geico gave me Corona :(

Are you telling me I played ark for five years and I never knew these guys can climb , seriously

When a Komodo dragon and a gecko love each other very much...

Don't let it steal your eggs when you're not looking.

This is what caused Mount Tambora to Erupt

Can we all agree on calling this a Moschops on drugs? Please- IT'S A CRACKCHOP