Dododex

ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion

Question

What are some funny jokes or stories about the dire bear? Funny dire bear jokes submitted by ARK players.

score 6 · Answer 1 · 2022-07-22T19:05:21+00:00

You.meh maybe I’ll find something in red woods

You.hey it Winnie the Pooh

Winniepooh. I eat you

score 8 · Answer 2 · 2021-06-29T21:58:56+00:00

I was out exploring looking for an argentavis to tame in the snow biome and when I finally found one and knocked it out so I went and got some food for it and found a dire bear eating the argentavis. From then forward, I built spikes around whenever I tamed anything

score 7 · Answer 3 · 2021-12-09T20:09:00+00:00

Real men punch this thing down at level 150 and then feeds it an assortment of berries with narco berries mixed in

score 9 · Answer 4 · 2020-10-22T02:48:07+00:00

Name your survivor Christopher Robin and it will spare you

score 13 · Answer 5 · 2018-08-20T17:01:25+00:00

Pooh bear is in the game! My dad tamed a yellow bear with honey

score 6 · Answer 6 · 2022-05-30T21:49:28+00:00

Winnie the Pooh packs a punch.

Great for caves and seems to get faster XP than a Rex

(Hits harder than my base rex)that I use for every day tasks

Can’t wait to breed for mutations and focus on health mutations since it is high damage and lacks HP

My base bear is 9k health and 700% melee.

score 9 · Answer 7 · 2020-09-24T00:59:36+00:00

me:seeing a direbear for the first time* hmm its just a teddy bear

direbear:come here lunch

me:oh sh$t i was wrong

score 3 · Answer 8 · 2024-02-08T13:00:00+00:00

* but nobody laughed.

score 6 · Answer 9 · 2022-03-05T09:18:22+00:00

i was searching for a direbear at the beach of redwood, then i landed whit my pt on a fallen tree and i see a direbear in the water eating sabertooth salmons

score 9 · Answer 10 · 2020-06-06T13:56:33+00:00

1) Tame 1 male, 1 female

2) ~10k health, rest melee

3) Bring to Scorched Earth

4) Become Dune Master

score 9 · Answer 11 · 2020-04-04T03:18:26+00:00

This is winny the pooh if he has no hunny for years

score 10 · Answer 12 · 2019-08-08T12:53:14+00:00

Tammed a level 20 named Winnie. It took out a carno, scorpion, and sabertooth. On our way back to it got eaten by piranhas. RIP Winnie:/

score 8 · Answer 13 · 2020-10-07T03:48:00+00:00

Tame one and paint it red and yellow, tame a daedon paint it pink and tame an equus then paint it blue.

score 3 · Answer 14 · 2023-11-17T17:02:40+00:00

Like a cute cuddly teddy bear if cute cuddly teddy bears were incredibly violent

score 4 · Answer 15 · 2023-04-02T06:34:11+00:00

is thus the april fools update? Cuz i dont see no bear i see a grandma in a bear costume

score 6 · Answer 16 · 2021-12-22T09:29:18+00:00

Pog Dino, cutest level up animation(mine is called potato:))

score 5 · Answer 17 · 2022-06-23T17:48:10+00:00

“Look Boo Boo a Picnic basket!”

score 5 · Answer 18 · 2022-06-04T15:03:12+00:00

It's just a big KILLER TEDDY

AAAAAH RUUUUUN

score 8 · Answer 19 · 2020-06-09T04:12:20+00:00

When I first tried to tame one it was level 137 and it killed me in one bite 😩

score 6 · Answer 20 · 2021-07-28T06:05:37+00:00

Me: truth or dare?

Friend: dare

Me: 😮

Me: ok for your dare we play a game called DIE OR BEAR!

Friend: ummmmm…

Me: chooooooose noooooooooow!

Friend: b-b-bbb- bear

Me:they be the same 😈 oh and it’s not die or bear it’s DIRE BEAR BECAUSE THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE HAHAHAH😈😈😈😈😈

Friend: waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat