Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Funny Tips

What are some funny jokes or stories about the thylacoleo? Funny thylacoleo jokes submitted by ARK players.
If u think this thing’s pounce radius is small then ur wrong
When I was trying to tame a giga I had to go through the redwoods
So basically a thyla tried to pounce me and as soon as I saw the giga the thyla had sniped me from the redwoods to the volcano. (Long story short I died. To lava. So I got a few grapples and got my stuff because I am not getting more stuff and another rhynio. I hope u guys liked this story
Goodbyeeee
In case anyone is concerned, yes these animals are WAY oversized
In real life thylacoleo was no bigger than a small black bear, hardly reaching 350 pounds. However the indigenous people of Australia feared this thing more than any other creature including the 20+ foot long, venomous dragon called megalania
Me: Oh hey, this redwood forest sure is quiet! I love Lost Island.
(Jake) Thyla 1: Oh look an innocent man with a pet Compy, and he’s riding a Dire Bear!
(Sniper) Thyla 2: What do you think boys, should we say hello?!?
(Kevin) Thyla 3: Visible Confusion*
The 3 Thylas quietly climb down the tree from branch to branch. Suddenly, Kevin falls 20 feet down the tree behind the man.
Kevin: Huh, my hurt heads.
Jake and Sniper: GOD F******G DAMN IT KEVIN WHY DO YOU RUIN EVERY HUNT!!!?!??!?
Man: Walks away after staring at Kevin.
Kevin runs after the man and snatches him by the pants.
Hey guys, did I do good?
Jake and Sniper: Eh, we got food, who cares anymore.
Kevin: Okey Dokey, I will bring up the food!
Jake and Sniper: When will he learn to hunt?