Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Funny Tips

What are some funny jokes or stories about the raptor? Funny raptor jokes submitted by ARK players.
One time when I got back to my base with my raptor then when I dismounted him he ran off a couple days later when I was riding on my ptera I found him chillin near where I killed a Dino with him when I brought him back again I checked his harvesting settings then I noticed I left it on when I was farming hide :>
Making my way down town with me dodo :)
Raptor:o m a e W a m o u shindurue
Me:N A N I
(Insert mlg bola hit)
(Raptor breaks free)
Raptor:i can pounce now btw
Human:oh cool they let raptor pou...
Raptor: voilation time
Human: my pp is getting big
Raptor: bites extra thicc pp off
Human: pain
Raptor: this pp i admit tastes ABSOLUTELY TANTALIZING
I shall leave now
Im gonna take your dodo with me though
Human: no not my dick
Justice for g fitz
Always pay attention to your surroundings. Once I saw two raptors, one blue and one green and thought I could take them on. I threw a bola at the blue one, and started stabbing it with a pike. But the other one was nowhere to be seen so I thought “where was that other one?” but I didn’t really care. When I almost killed the raptor, a gallimimus was running away from something, but I didn’t think much of it as it’s probably just another plain old dilo. I was WRONG. DEAD WRONG. The green raptor was back, WITH A WHOLE PACK OF RAPTORS HERE TO KILL ME! I tried to run, but I got pounced and died. ALWAYS pay attention to your surroundings, even harmless wild creatures.
On The Last Day Of Christmas Dino Clause Said To Me:
12 People Screaming
11 People Dead
10 People Fighting Rexs But Are In Over Their Head
9 Raptors Running
8 Pros Chasing
7 Compys Screeching
6 Rexs Roaring
5 Trikes Charging
4 Baryonx Fishing
3 Carnos Killing
2 Dilos Spitting
That's What A Person Named Dino Clause Said To Me.