Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Tips & Strategies
Friend: may I pet your lizard? Me: sure you can.
Friend: Oh awesome he's so scaly and big!
Me : Oh wait he has rabbies.
Friend: WWWHHHHHAAAAAAATTTT why would you let me pet him?
Me: it's funny.
Friend:ok bud that's enough.
Text message from rabbies to friend: Your highly contagious of Mega Rabies!
Friend: WHAT what is MEGA RABIES?
Megalania: (after Friend dies of mega rabies) hey Friend mind of you say hello to my friends onyc and titanoboa?
Friend: sure..... oh hello onyc and titanoboa!
Onyc and titanoboa: HI WhAtS Up???? Here's this paper.
Friend: *reads it* We will gladly reun your day!! (They can't spell good) what those ruen mean?
Onyc and titanoboa: YoU FeLl InTo ArE TrAp.,.ยก!!!ยก
Friend: What?
Titanoboa: nom
Onyc: nom nom nom
Friend : (fell asleep and has mega rabbies) "bruh"
Arthropluera: spits (breaks all his flak armor)
Friend: noooooooooooooooooo.
Araono (don't know how to spell it let's just call it spider)
Spider: guys step back I can finish the job.
Friend: Is that a giant spider? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Spider: ๐ delicious.
Me: ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐
More Megalania Funny Tips
Please read these megalania tips with an Australian accent.
Have you ever wanted your own ginormous monitor lizard that can transmit rabies and climb your walls? Well TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY! Knock one of these WONDERFUL komodo dragons out and shove some of that wonderful baryonyx kibble down its bacteria infected mouth and you've got yourself a GIANT MONITOR LIZARD!
Recommend a 100+Gallon tank and proper UV and Heating (preferably over 100watts). Handling is not suggested, but riding definitely is.
Scare the living HELL out of your roomate by leaving your giant lizard on your ceiling! Or have your mother come home to a RABIFIED surprise!
CALL NOW and get YOUR VERY OWN BRED MUTATED FULLY IMPRINTED GIANT MONITOR PARKOUR LIZARD!
(Amazing tame. Found clung to walls in caves.)
On the carno island cave, as I was coming back from the artifact, a lil poo came from the ceiling. I looked up and some weird crocodile beast fell on me and gave me cancer.
Cancer Cave Crocodile is its new nickname.
Guys I found the source of the corona virus
They are literally the combination for of the element of surprise the element of wall climbing and they use the those tactics to perfect use hehe rabies
These are Purlovias, Thylacoleos and diseased leechs on steroids
me:goes into artifact of the hunter cave
megalania:im bout to do whats called a pro gamer move
Spider man, Spider man
Does what ever a spider can
Climbs a wall
Survive a 10 meter fall
Gives you rabies
He is in the shape of hades
Look, there goes Spider Man
When we first encountered these me and my friend is like:
Me: oo a Moschops!
Friend: hey why is it appro- AAAH-
Friend contracts Mega Rabies
Me: WHAT Happend?
Friend: get tf away from me I have COVID-20
Me: ohh megalania huh...- oh shi-
I contract Mega Rabies
Me: well... uhh just eat narcotics and hope we live lol
We both lived and went on our day
Have good day/night and press the "I like it" button if you want to
Real men knock it out with their fists.............