Please read these megalania tips with an Australian accent.

Have you ever wanted your own ginormous monitor lizard that can transmit rabies and climb your walls? Well TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY! Knock one of these WONDERFUL komodo dragons out and shove some of that wonderful baryonyx kibble down its bacteria infected mouth and you've got yourself a GIANT MONITOR LIZARD!

Recommend a 100+Gallon tank and proper UV and Heating (preferably over 100watts). Handling is not suggested, but riding definitely is.

Scare the living HELL out of your roomate by leaving your giant lizard on your ceiling! Or have your mother come home to a RABIFIED surprise!

CALL NOW and get YOUR VERY OWN BRED MUTATED FULLY IMPRINTED GIANT MONITOR PARKOUR LIZARD!

(Amazing tame. Found clung to walls in caves.)

On the carno island cave, as I was coming back from the artifact, a lil poo came from the ceiling. I looked up and some weird crocodile beast fell on me and gave me cancer.

Cancer Cave Crocodile is its new nickname.

Guys I found the source of the corona virus

These are Purlovias, Thylacoleos and diseased leechs on steroids

me:goes into artifact of the hunter cave

megalania:im bout to do whats called a pro gamer move

Spider man, Spider man

Does what ever a spider can

Climbs a wall

Survive a 10 meter fall

Gives you rabies

He is in the shape of hades

Look, there goes Spider Man

( Aussie accent) an’ ere’ we ‘ave a wild comodo dragon, and don’t worry, ‘es very friendly.

— plastic bag

Real men knock it out with their fists.............

When we first encountered these me and my friend is like:

Me: oo a Moschops!

Friend: hey why is it appro- AAAH-

Friend contracts Mega Rabies

Me: WHAT Happend?

Friend: get tf away from me I have COVID-20

Me: ohh megalania huh...- oh shi-

I contract Mega Rabies

Me: well... uhh just eat narcotics and hope we live lol

We both lived and went on our day

Have good day/night and press the "I like it" button if you want to