I was a beginner and thought it was a good idea to see if I could tame it… long story short don’t try to knock ur out with your fists

You need beer to tame this, just, don’t tame it, don’t do it, unless you want a drunk poop-throwing sloth running around

me: walks along on beach

Calicotherium: hey wanna feed me beer

Me: sure

Me: gets a heinken 0% alchohol beer

Me: brings it to calicotherium who drinks it

Calicotherium: thats not beer thats fake

Me: no its not I totally didn’t give you a no alchohol beer

Calicotherium: ye you did

(Dumb ass was killed by alchoholic sloth)

Dumbass has left the chat:

THIS MAN KILLED SAND MAN V2 (it is a female

dilophosurs) IF YOU THIS THING KILLED MURDER IT PLS

Okay, there is (possible) reasoning on why Chalico’s boulders deal more damage than their raw melee: they put less power behind their claw swing to avoid breaking a nail (I’m not wrong!!).

It likes...beer? What? COME ON ARK! USE LOGIC! NO DINOSAUR EVEN KNEW WHAT BEER WAS! I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY IM RANTING BOUT THIS!

oh hey. You found me.

Ah yes you're still scrolling

Still going?

You've been here a while.

Go make a sandwich

Try and lick a raptor.

Make a raptor sandwich

Bring me cheese.

You may now updoot and consider looking at other memes and comments on dododex.

Just gotta crack a cold one with the boys

I tamed one then went to get my raft to bring it to my base but forgot to whistle stop and it followed my pteranodon into the water and was killed by jellyfish

I was wandering around like a usually beach noob, I saw two of these fighting (idk why) and when they both killed each other I opened their inventory and it was fricken packed with beer! I guess they got so drunk and fought lol

It absolutely loves corona. Just cough on it.

They have tons of parties at night and drink beer. They be like chugging it till morning.

-Gitezgood

Im here till Thursday, try the veal!

It’s a drunk mf.

They will lit through poo balls at u and get all up in yo face don’t let these monkey horses do dat

Player: “too bad we don’t have a Dino that looks friendly and looks like a rock but it’s not.”

Ark: “HoLd mY bEeR”

It's a shitty tame it gets drunk a lot

Me: welp look like this is my last day on earth! 😭

The Dino I’m failing to tame: SOMEONE HOLD ME BEER IMMA KILL THIS WOMEN!!!!

Me: 😨

The Dino: *RAMS HEAD FIST FOR THE HUMAN*

Me:😵

The Dino: HA THE HUMAN DIED!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Me after I respawn: 😑 ok that ended really badly I should prob- *looks up*

The giga: did you just, BUMP INTO ME!?!?!?

Me: 😨😰 *my mind: well I’m dead😭*

The giga: kills the human*

Me in ark heaven: …* screams out “I SHOULDN’T BE HERE!!!!!!”*

Guys he frows poo from his butt

A chali came up behind me and slapped me it said hahaha

They defend

They attack

Most importantly

They throw poop