If the queen impregnates you than aren’t you the reaper king?🤔

Ark dev 1: hey let’s make a new creature

Ark dev 2: sure, what do you want to implement?

Ark dev 1: let’s take the allosaur idea, I’d like that

Ark dev 2: continue

Ark dev 1: let’s make it scary as heck

Ark dev 2: ok

Ark dev 1: let’s give it the roar of a demon

Ark dev 2: uhh.. ok

Ark dev 1: let’s make it so hard to tame that no one wants it

Ark dev 2: maybe this is a litt..

Ark dev 1: hush. Let’s make players have to get pregnant to tame it

Ark dev 2: oh well…

Ark dev 1: let’s cover it in spikes

Ark dev 2: this is getting out of hand…

Ark dev 1: let’s make it shoot weird ball things from a weird tail

Ark dev 2: I guess

Ark dev 1: let’s make it tunnel under ground an attack when you least expect

Ark dev 2: oh dear…

Ark dev 1: let give it ridiculous amounts of health

Ark dev 2: is that it?

Ark dev 1: yup

Ark dev 2: were going to get so much crap for this…

Up if this was funny!

I think I got too attached to my Reaper. When it was born I built an entire room for it complete with a tiny makeshift crib and blue wood walls. I cherished everyday with it and when I lost it to a level 175 Crab while I was tripping out on mushrooms I invited the whole god damned server to a funeral

(Oh and afterwards we had a feast and guess what was on the menu, Crab)

- The one and only HazmatGaming209

So does it pay child support or...?

Ground ground, how much Mr Eazi you have a reporters comes out of a growler need you to live very death happily ever Apple to your death

The email end

This big demon pops out of the ground impregnates you and leaves. What a player😂😂😂

Me: yes, I will finally stack my XP by killing this reaper queen!

Me thinking: ( she is at 1/4 heath, lemme get my magnifying glass and make sure.

(Gets really close)

Me: okay here we go

Reaper queen: Oh yes child come here I have a gift for u

Me: what did u say

Reaper queen: COME CLOSER CHILD

Me: what.. what.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Reaper queen: YOU WILL HAVE MY CHILD!

5 year later

Me: Honey, I’m back. OH MY GOD, COOLDUD63 HOW COULD YOU!! HOW MANY OTHER PLAYERS HAVE YOU IMPREGNATED QUEEN

Reaper queen: The entire server

10 years later

Me: queen I need the child support, we’re struggling here

Lol please up this so everybody can see, I worked hard on this, thx 4 reading

Pain isn't weakness leaving the body.

Pain is your newly acquired mutant child bursting through your chest as it's form of birth.

And I thought human pregnancies were terrifying

So first she kills my tames, impregnates me against my will, then she doesn’t even pay for the diapers or child support

Reaper: “You cannot stop me.”

Me at 1 hp: “I know.. But they can.”

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