Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Tips & Strategies
How and why does she inpregnate you ;)
More Reaper Funny Tips
If the queen impregnates you than arenβt you the reaper king?π€
I think I got too attached to my Reaper. When it was born I built an entire room for it complete with a tiny makeshift crib and blue wood walls. I cherished everyday with it and when I lost it to a level 175 Crab while I was tripping out on mushrooms I invited the whole god damned server to a funeral
(Oh and afterwards we had a feast and guess what was on the menu, Crab)
- The one and only HazmatGaming209
So does it pay child support or...?
girls: boys canβt give birth
male ark players: think again
This big demon pops out of the ground impregnates you and leaves. What a playerπππ
Me: yes, I will finally stack my XP by killing this reaper queen!
Me thinking: ( she is at 1/4 heath, lemme get my magnifying glass and make sure.
(Gets really close)
Me: okay here we go
Reaper queen: Oh yes child come here I have a gift for u
Me: what did u say
Reaper queen: COME CLOSER CHILD
Me: what.. what.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Reaper queen: YOU WILL HAVE MY CHILD!
5 year later
Me: Honey, Iβm back. OH MY GOD, COOLDUD63 HOW COULD YOU!! HOW MANY OTHER PLAYERS HAVE YOU IMPREGNATED QUEEN
Reaper queen: The entire server
10 years later
Me: queen I need the child support, weβre struggling here
Lol please up this so everybody can see, I worked hard on this, thx 4 reading
Pain isn't weakness leaving the body.
Pain is your newly acquired mutant child bursting through your chest as it's form of birth.
And I thought human pregnancies were terrifying
How to become a reaper queen or king?
Get a sword and slice a dodo
Then, roast it on a campfire
Finally, eat itβs body and laugh viciously
Me: ok I hered that you can tame a reper well raise it so I'll just get it to 1/4 heath then it so something.
Reaper queen: come here.
(Picks me up)
Me:?!
Me:wtf I fell weird ill just kill things.
(The next day)
My spino:you okay?you look sick!
Me:ok I'll just build a room and stay in it.
(Biulds a room)
Me:(blows up)ahhhhhh what?
Baby reaper:(eats me)
Me:(respawns)of that's how you get one?!(replaces wall with glass)
Baby reaper:Dada.
(The next week)
Me:(rides it)wahoooo
Willd raptor:run for your lives!!!!!!!!!
Player 1: Let me do the final boss
Player 1: *dies*
Player 1: so let's up my game
*Gmsummon Reaper_Character_BP_C 2000000000.
Game crashes.
Player 1: welp at least I saved with my other dinos.
Save deletes.
Player 1: aw come on.
Rage quits.