Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Funny Tips
What are some funny jokes or stories about the microraptor? Funny microraptor jokes submitted by ARK players.
If you came here looking for taming advice the best I can give is:
Don’t.
It is your sworn duty as a survivor on the ark to hunt these grimy little chicken legged LOSERS to absolute extinction. Declare war on their species and commit the most egregious of war crimes upon them. Make a mockery of the Geneva Convention as you destroy everything they have ever or will ever love by the most by the most inhumane and down-right sinister of means. Grind their will to live into the dirt by the sole of your flak boots until they have no choice but to leave us in peace to roam the arks from the safety of our mounts. Do not rest until they have been exterminated like the pests they are! For all of us!!
I hate this thing with every fiber of my being. I don't think it's possible to hate something more than I hate these infuriating little nuisances. My burning hatred is more intense than a thousand suns, and I wish every conceivable bad thing that could possibly happen to this thing, to happen to them. I hope that they forget to turn the brightness down on their dino phone screens and blind themselves in the middle of the night when they are just trying to check the time. I hope that every day they step on the SHARPEST lego piece available, then stub their pinky toe while they are trying to recover, and I hope that on top of all of that that they will never be able to find their left shoes. Only the left shoes.
I wish these things would go back to being extinct and this time I hope it hurts.