Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Funny Tips

What are some funny jokes or stories about the hyaenodon? Funny hyaenodon jokes submitted by ARK players.
Don’t tame them. They’re dogs. In the wild, they run up and POOP ON YOUUUUU! Literally. I found a Pack once, and they grabbed me, bringing me home to their cave. They pinned me on the ground, arms and legs out, pried my mouth open, and sat down on it. Pooped in my mouth, my pants, my shirt, hat, boots... everything! Then they pooped on my limbs, trapping me there. They abandoned the cave when they were done. Later, a Tribe found me. Instead of helping me out, they laughed hysterically at me and grabbed me. They brought me to their base and caged me. I was still covered in the poop, and they didn’t clean me. They forced me to eat poop every day all day. I was their target practice. Soon enough, they released me, bringing me out to the wild. Right to another Pack... but this time I was nude. The hyenas’ private parts went into my holes... they devoured my breasts... and pooped on me again.
Not gonna lie I’m either just lucky or y’all overcomplicate things all did was murder all those close to him on an emotional level, then it becomes passive. The thing about them is they are like compy on aggressive in number. Except compy just stares into your soul while this one leaves.
ahem* ahem*
Like my dad
ahem* ahem*
Hyaenodons are so annoying just thinking about it, every time your in the center they always there, when you are taming or got a kill they always run up and eat it, so I just bring out my sniper and go on a mountain 🏔 and spy on him and when a hyaenodon comes, I just shoot him with my sniper and I always win and just for security I put one of my dinosaurs their JUST in case. PLS like this…………thank you for reading.