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ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Stories Tips
What are some stories about the achatina? Memorable achatina stories, wild encounters, and fan fiction.
From Ben
Thanks for reading Chapter 30 PrimalApex! I cannot believe I made it this far... I wouldnt have gotten here without you guys!
Angel take as many breaks as you need. I also read your Zohakuten dragon story, i think its pretty neat. Not much else to say about the story though.
Sandmaster that is so lame, hate it when i accidentally kill creatures. Also i didnt know ferox was your fav animal. Well, thats why you wrote Overseer right? Its based off your pet Ferox.
Well, guess thats it?
Fun Fact: I used to have a story here on the Dex named "The Arks: Alternative Timeline". I went by the name OBJ (this is an acronym for OtherBenJ), and i only got up to Chapter 2.
I have no intentions to finish that story. Why should I when I have Arks Over Heaven!
Hi guys, have y’all heard the song “We don’t talk about Bruno”? Well I remade it for my story. WARNING: DON’T READ IF YOU HAVEN’T READ TTOTSP. IT WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS(also it will contain spoilers even if you HAVE read TTOTSP. Here it is:
We don’t talk about Thomas.
Arianna: “we don’t talk about Thomas no no no. We don’t talk about Thomas but……it was our leaving day.”
Aragorn: “it was our leaving day.”
Arianna: “and there wasn’t a
Cloud in the sky.”
Aragorn: “not a cloud in the sky.”
Arianna: “Leah falls in the lake and dies.”
Aragorn: “Anger!”
Arianna: “Are you telling this story or am I?”
Aragorn: “I’m sorry my darling go on.”
Arianna: “Thomas says what have you done?!”
Aragorn: “Why did he blame us?!”
Arianna: “In his anger he grew so big!”
Aragorn: “Gotta row away!”
Arianna: Leah got killed that day.
Aragorn: What a sad day but anyway…”
Arianna and Aragorn together: “We don’t talk about Thomas, no no no. We don’t talk about Thomas.”
Emma: “Hey, I grew up in fear of Thomas killing or threatening. I can always see him sort of raving and chasing. I associate him with the sound of falling bodies. (Thump, thump, thump) It’s a heavy lift with a gift frightening. Always left mom and dad confused, grappling with visions they couldn’t understand. Do you understand?”
Jenny(transforms into Thomas as a beast): “100 feet tall, huge and frightening. When he finds you, you will surely pay. Yeah, he kills and hurts and loves your screams.”(Hey)
Everyone: “We don’t talk about Thomas no no no. We don’t talk about Thomas.”
Victim 1: “He killed my aunt all bc she got in the way.” (No no)
Victim 2: “He tried to kill me! Because I betrayed him!” (No no)
Victim 3: “He said I was a failure bc of my weakness.” (No no)
Everyone: “You’re fate is sealed when you get in his way!”
Josephina: “He told me I looked like Leah and he took me in.”
Emma: “He took my sister and turned her to the dark side. She is gone now. I can see them now.”
Jaquin: “Hey sir pls take me as well.”
Emma: “I can see them now. Yeah, I can see them now.”
Jack: “Um Thomas, I really need to know about Thomas. Gimme the truth and the whole truth Thomas!”
Executioner: “Mayors, the Petersons are here!”
Mayors: “Time for hanging!”
Everyone singing at once so it’s all overlapping: “It was our leaving day. ” “He told me I looked like Leah..” “100 feet tall huge and frightening.” “Mayors, the Petersons are here.” “Hey sir pls take me as well.”
Jack: “Oh why did I talk about Thomas?! Why did I talk about Thomas”
Written by SunnyFox57. The rhythm of the song is based on the song “we don’t talk about Bruno” from Encanto. Enjoy!
-SunnyFox57
Btw guys Edwards’ power was strength. It wasn’t directly stated but that’s why I said “Edward slid behind the heavy throne, picked it up, and hurled it at the Krakos”. Idk if y’all caught that part. Anyways..I gotta work on my next chapter. Also ben, take as much time as you need for chapter thirty. I can’t wait to see what happens next!
-SunnyFox57
P.S:Fun fact, TTOTSP is longer in word length than TTDOT.
from Ben
Arks Over Heaven Chapter 30 might take a little bit longer to come out compared to the previous ones, it’s going to be very very special and may or may not have some scenes in there that are going to require a lot of care and thought put into. Soo perhaps expect Chapter 30 out by Saturday or Sunday. Sorry about that, but trust me that this chapter is going to be great!
Woah, I guess you are right PrimalApex… if Sunny confirms it herself. I thought that when Tom said that it just meant he was smart and he kind of understood James’ feelings… but in that chapter I realize that he said he was going to “convince” their parents to visit one last time, that sort of makes sense now. However I wonder what the Krakos has to do with this? They are beings created by extreme anger. And also I’m wondering if Tom’s power makes him sick? Well it does, right, but to what extreme?
Sandmaster, Chapter 13 was super cool! Nice work showing what species the inspectors were, although the Rock Drake part confused me (even though this scene was super awesome!). What does it mean by they know they’re lying? Lying about what, going on the ship? I don’t really understand this part, can you please clarify? Well the Shadowmane, Eclipse sounds pretty cool, and I wonder how Fuzzball’s going to get out of this. He needs to hurry fast so he can save his family… Well I’ll be waiting for Chapter 14!
Also SunnyFox I somehow didn’t see the Prologue of TOHM in Fenrisulfr, I guess I just skipped past it or something. Whoopsie daisy. Mmm, interesting, a first person perspective story is always a lot of fun to read and write. I spent a year working on a 1st person perspective once and I’ve grown fond of it, I connect with the main character more tbh. So let’s see here… main character is Hailey and she’s gone a bit mad which is why it’s called House of Madness, neat! Also has a Hyaenodon named Brutus… A Hyaenodon’s Scar reference? Nyeh heh heh. Also the dream she has, I think that’s supposed to be Tortuga, isn’t it? The square is the town square, and that house is the boat house that the Buckleshoot family sail away in. Now I’m just wondering how Hailey dreams this…
Also Chapter 1 really shows how crazy Hailey is… schizophrenic? Her reflection talks back to her, and Brutus talks. And I wonder what Marv’s relation is. Butler? Sounds like it. And I wonder what his real name is. And Hailey’s father seems like a king, although I don’t think it’s Tom, Tom would never marry someone else he loved Leah too much. Probably someone new. Also Hailey’s design reminds me of like a reverse Enid Sinclair, that one character from Wednesday Addams show.
And Chapter 2… DANG! Tom just killed his father! And probably his mother too. Which is kind of sad, his mother didn’t really do anything wrong, it was his father. And I guess we’ll never know Edward’s medallion power 😞. I don’t blame him for killing his father, his father didn’t necessarily CARE about them, he just wanted him and James to be king. And for some reason now they want Tom to not be king? I’d be upset as well. Tom doesn’t need to go through all this. So unless he’s been doing some actual villainous stuff and hurting innocents, I stand by the fact that Tom didn’t really do anything wrong. And since Jenny is still alive, I wonder if we’ll see her in the future.
That was nice reading, nice chapters everyone! Later!
Hi Reader!! It has been a long time!! I have kept up with your story and I am enjoying it!! I just haven’t replied back in a while. A lot has happened, Moon computer died and had to pause writing for a bit. But she’s back. I had to change my name from Apex to PrimalApex. And several other things and a lot of stories. I’m sorry that I haven’t responded to you in a while. Hope you can forgive me about that.
Anyways, Until next time!
-PrimalApex:)
Ben, the reason I say it’s suggested is because Tom says something to the point to James that if he could only use his power to convince you. And James says that he promised he wouldn’t use his powers on him and then mentions he would also get sick from it. Now this could mean anything but how they were talking made it sound like his power has something to do with mind manipulation or something in a similar manner or a type of hypnosis. It could be something else like telekinesis or something else but I thought I could try to make a guess at his. I probably shouldn’t have said suggested and said something more like “might suggest that it could be”. Suggested makes it sound more probable to bewhile I meant to say something like it possibly be. My mistake for saying that.
Also the Prologue for THOM released in Fenrisulfr earlier. I saw you asked me earlier about it and I didn’t know if you already saw it yet or not.
Anyway, Until next time!!!
-PrimalApex:)
From Ben
PrimalApex i dont think THOM released yet, are you talking about the revised chapters?
Also I guess youre right, Kapro isnt the WORST, even though there are better cavers... (Baryonyx, Thylacoleo, Sabertooth), there are far worse creatures out there.
Like ahem, Titanoboa or Troodon.
At least annoying creatures such as Pegomastax and Ichthyornis have some sort of utility use (thief in PVP and healthy fish respectively).
From Ben
SunnyFox I read the reworked chapters and they are major improvements, you did a fantastic job on this ending! And The House of Madness... hmm, i wonder when this takes place in the story.
Bob the Survivor, you shouldnt have to worry about how many subscribers you have on your YT channel. 24 is a good amount! Also you might want to consider a recording software. I think you can search up a tutorial if you have Xbox or Playstation.
Thanks for the tips Ben! I redid the last two chapters. Tell me how u like them! Also I read ur newest chapter. I bet June is the girl that Aurora said was “interested in Ben after the tennis match”. Yeah…Sorry June, I don’t think Ben is ur type. Anyways…the next book is called “the house of madness” or THOP. Cya!
-SunnyFox57
from Ben
Chapter 29 of Arks Over Heaven has released in Crystal Wyvern Queen 👍. Some very interesting things are being revealed as you read this chapter… So read carefully.
Question of the Day: What’s your favorite ‘ship’ in the stories you’ve read here so far? TTDOT/TTOTSP has got to be Arianna and Aragorn/James, Obelisk I’d go with Orbit and Moonbeam, and yeah I think that’s all I can think of.
No way, no way that that’s the end of TTOTSP!
I had a feeling they would meet Sirens, but I didn’t think it’d get Leah KILLED!
And I don’t know why I feel this way, but I feel like the ending for TTOTSP was a lot more lackluster than TTDOT… I’m not trying to be mean but the impact of Leah’s death didn’t seem that great. It felt too fast and it felt like it didn’t really matter Leah died. But it should matter, because Leah is Tom’s lover and she means so much to him!
I also felt like Cole should have had more emotional impact in this scene where they’re getting married. I noticed that the moment Michael experienced has the same issue as well with conveying emotion. If we want to convey emotion, we should show it through physical actions as that’s what we typically do when we experience emotions.
Ex: If we are happy, we smile. If we are sad, our faces may drop. And if we are angry, we might clench our fists or grit our teeth or furrow our eyebrows or all of the above.
Showing that Cole’s heart filled with anger really shows he’s angry, but not showing actions will make it seem a little silly, and the audience might not take it seriously. I think this moment can be SUPER powerful. After all Cole’s best friend, James decides to just marry her even though he knew he liked her! How could he do something like that, right? What a distasteful man! Ptah!
Finally, the moment Tom transforms into a Krakos. This moment could be SUPER GOOD if just one thing was tweaked, the reason why he is angry.
Here, the Sirens attack the canoes that James, Leah, and Arianna are traveling on. Leah and Arianna are apprehended first because Sirens take the women first because they can break the Siren’s spells. James manages to save Arianna, but not Leah, and she ends up DEAD. Tom ends up in a state of rage and transforms into a Krakos, screaming out James’s name as he believes he is the fault of Leah’s death.
I feel like this doesn’t make too much sense. While James did begin to paddle away and not attempt to save Leah, it was the heat of the moment. Tom has known James all his life, they are twins! Tom, I feel like should be more upset at himself than anything for not being there to help her. I feel like if this scene was changed a little bit to make Tom’s rage more justifiable it would be so much more impactful and we can empathize for Tom more. Now I just feel like… I don’t really care about Leah or Tom’s suffering.
Finally, to wrap it up, I think Tom’s initial reaction to this edited scene should be tweaked just a little bit (but not too much). I think more of the scene should be reflected on his anger before he transforms into a Krakos. From misery because of Leah’s death, transformed into absolute anger. He would scream out at James, “WHY DIDN’T YOU HELP HER?!”, “YOU ABANDONED HER!” “YOU LEFT HER TO DIE!” James tries his best to justify his actions, “I COULDN’T BROTHER I REALLY TRIED!” Tom’s face turns pale, looking at his lover’s lifeless eyes, before he turned up to James and his eyes began to visibly boil with rage. His medallion begins to glow, and James pleads for Tom to stop, it’s going to get him hurt and sick, but Tom doesn’t care. Wordlessly, he begins to slowly transform and twist into that monstrous Krakos. James doesn’t have time to apologize or say goodbye, in a hurry Arianna grabs his arm and ushers him to leave. James, bent on whether he should stay behind to calm his brother down or flee with his lover, decides to do the latter. The two flee via canoe, and James doesn’t turn around, FEARING and GRIEVING for the monster he had created.
I really do not want to be too harsh, but I just REALLY think this chapter should be reworked a little bit. I know that it was near the end of the story, so maybe you were trying your best to rush and churn it out as fast as possible, but I’d advise against it and take your time instead. Making a well constructed ending will be super awesome.
I know you have that collab story you want to work on with Nazgul, maybe you want to work on that as soon as possible, so if you want I can help you edit the story itself and tweak the last few chapters. It’s up to you though. Your story is still super good, you have a huge imagination and lots of creativity. I couldn’t think of half of these things in the story to be in mine.
Just please try not to rush out Chapters of really important chapters like these.
Well, I’ll catch you on the flipside. Stay bright Sunny.