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Sic Semper Tyrannis part V

???:Oh my god Caesar you’re ok!

Caesar:Calpurnia (one of his wives) what happened?!

Calpurnia:Well, I dreamed the roof of our house fell and I had your mangled corpse in my arms. It was bad.

Caesar:Well, let’s just go start doing stuff. By the way, I feel not well, sluggish.

Calpurnia:It might not be much.

Caesar:Ok, I’ve got some minor religious ceremony to deal with.

Calpurnia:Ok, see you later

The priest, Spurinna, was in the crowd at this ceremony. And Caesar jokingly called out:Spurinna! The Ides have come!

Spurinna:They have, but they have not yet gone.

After Caesar went home he said he still felt sluggish

Calpurnia:Rest and Recover

Caesar:Ok, I’ll go tell Antony to call off the meeting.

Antony:Hey guys, we aren’t meeting today.


Cassius:I dunno, maybe we could get him in the way to Dacia?

Decimus:No you idiot I have a better idea.

Decimus went to Caesar’s house.

Caesar:Hello Decimus, how’s it going?

Decimus:Just wanted to tell you that you shouldn’t call off the meeting, see, there is a bill (not real it was a trick by Decimus) that will allow you to use the title King outside of Italy, those people are little more than barbarians after all. But it isn’t universally supported, if you offend the senators cancelling meetings because of bad dreams, the bill might not pass.

Caesar:Uhhhh. Ok I’m coming.

Antony! Meeting’s back on!

Decimus breathed a sigh of relief as Caesar to walked to his grave

Though Decimus’s gladiators couldn’t come with them they loitered around their weapons claiming to be there to make an arrest because a gladiator violated a contract.

Due to Caesar being late many senators stood around chatting waiting for Caesar.

Cassius pulled Decimus and Casca aside. But some no name senator, Laenas, yelled :CASCA, Brutus told me your little secret! How dare you keep me in the dark like this! I hear you’re running for aedile, when did that happen.

Laenas was stopped from making a scene by another senator outside the conspiracy who pulled Cassius and Decimus aside, he said:I hope that you accomplish your task, please, do not delay, people know, and they are talking. Then Loudmouth Laenas made a big show of whisper in Caesar’s ear. It was nothing and everyone came inside. Trebonius pulled Antony aside on cue.

While Lucius Cimber, a conspirator distracted Caesar others formed a perimeter around him

Cimber:Caesar, may you please pardon my brother? An ex Pompeian?

Caesar:Your brother shows no remorse so, no.

Suddenly Cimber grabbed Caesar by the shoulder and pulled down his toga, exposing his shoulder, signaling everyone to start the killing. Casca, behind Caesar stabbed down as hard as he could but missed.

Caesar:Casca! What are you doing!? This is violence! (They we’re childhood friends)

They grappled a bit but then

Casca (in Greek):Brother help me!

Titedius came forward and everyone was running about.

Caesar saw Cassius who slashed him into the face. Titedius stabbed him in the ribs. Decimus gave a wound to the thigh, Cassius attacked again but in all the shoving it got to Brutus instead.

Caesar fell and Brutus, hand stained with blood, pulled out a dagger.

Caesar (in Greek):You too, my son?

He stabbed Caesar between the legs.

Caesar pulled his yoga up to preserve his last shred of dignity and died. Ironically, Caesar died under a statue of his rival, Pompey.


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