Lamp News

This is Lamp News your hearing from, and let’s get on with it! So, let’s start with the good topics!

I will give any viewers watching this 1 cent!

Shadow can apparently still make news, even in that glass jar! Somebody should do something about it!

Apex Predator has released, and it’s… well, it’s decent. There were parts that didn’t really make sense, but it wasn’t bad, just overhyped.

There’s a new story in town, and it’s interesting! It’s in Manta and it’s called “Voidborne!”

Roll the adds, bad grammar ghost!

“a”

(Ad) Are you a loser that needs to go touch some grass? Well, you clearly don’t seem like touching grass, so we’re bringing the grass to you! Keyboards, controllers, and joy cons all with grass on them!

(Ad) you stupid, we wasted money on this ad.

Well, that’s all the ads! Now for the bad topics.

I’ve been accused of starting a monarchy! I would never do such a thing, I am not greedy and do not wish to take any control over other dyes!

I was sent another letter by crow, this time telling me I’m stupid and I don’t know how to eat! Well, your stupid and don’t know how to eat, Crow! Another thing that was on the letter was a picture of me dying to Mantis Lords with 8 masks on hollow knight! I would never stoop so low, I’ll only die on sisters of battle, not Mantis Lords!

Well, that’s everything! Sadly we can’t do moths and monkeys because the monkeys and moths are being fed, and it can get a little… violent, if someone else enters while the moths and monkeys are being fed.

Remember, this is the superior news station!

-Lamprey