This is based off a poem by shel Silverstein (I think that’s how it’s spelled)

This morning I jumped on my equus and went out for a ride

But some wild raptors chased me and they bit me in the side

So I crawled into a sabertooth’s cave to find a place to hide

But some raiders had me sleeping there and soon they had me tied,

To a pole

And they built a fire under me-I almost cried

Till Helena Walker cut me loose and begged to be my bride

So I said I’d come back Wednesday

But I must admit I lied

So I ran into a jungle swamp but I forgot my tribe

And I stepped into some quicksand

But no matter how I tried, i couldn’t get out,

Until I met a water snake named Clyde

Who pulled me to some cannibals

Who planned to have me fried

But an eagle came and swooped me up

And through the air we flied

But he dropped me in the ocean

A thousand megalodons inside

And you’ll never guess what I did then-

I DIED