-BREAKING NEWS-

Lolbit News

Turns out some people ACTUALLY like my news channel and I don’t even post it that much

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

-technical difficulties-

Shadows probably inconvenient death

It’s AMAZING! SOMEONE ACTUALLY MANAGED TO KILL THE ANNOYING PEST SHADOW! Oh, but apparently she was brought to back to life by survivor, HOW DARE HE

Dark ones inconvenient death

Unfortunately, when shadow died, dark one died, but don’t be sad! I brought him back to life as well! Yayyyyyyyyy(and no, I am not being sarcastic)

Apex

Apex is a god now! I think he changed his name or something but I’m insane so I don’t pay that much attention, anyway, so um, make sure to say the d word a lot so you can all die beautifully painful deaths, I will sit and watch

News on dyes being taken over

Okay so, it seems that I-, I mean Lolbit, is trying to take over the dyes again with multiple people. Several people have become Lolbits followers, such as Ghost, Ghoul, Goblin, a lot of G’s, and someone else’s name, that I forgot. Lolbit has also teamed up with Dark one and Thrax, god of the void, so, theresaninetyninepointnineprecentchanceyouwillalldie

The beginning of the end

The popular fanfictioner, WhiteWinterTiger, is planning an amazing finale for Ally’s Hope. Wait. Did you think I would use a title that sounded cool on just someone’s finale of a story? If you did, well, YOUR STUPID, here’s what I was really gonna say. It seems Survivor has destroyed purple hq, where WhiteWinterTiger lives, and since she was already mentally unstable due to me taking over the dyes again, shadow dying, other things, caused her to rage in dragon form and completely obliterate sky dye, isn’t that nice? Here’s a fun fact, I sat and watched from a distance, and didn’t do anything about it even though I could have stopped her! Wonderful

HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY THIS, WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER

okay, so, I might be mentally insane and extremely g-g-g-g-g-glitchy, but I do have good ideas sometimes so if you ever need some new ideas I am happy to help

TRAITORS!!!!

It seems that there is AN IMPOSTER IN MY ARMY, manticore has previously stated that he has inside intel given to him by someone in my army, one of my followers, it’s a good thing I have a plan to deal with that, and I also didn’t tell anyone my legit plan, yeah that’s right, when someone asked me what my plan was, well, I lied, I didn’t give full details, MY plans are MUCH more detailed than that, how stupid are you people?

Always remember

LOLBIT NEWS IS SUPERIOR

I’m a glitch in the system, cant outrun, better watch your step, if not I’ll come

-Lolbit