From Ben

OMG it’s already May. That’s kind of crazy to think about it. School year is almost over for me, it ends May 23rd. That’s 17 days left and I’m done. I’m not complaining though, that means more time for me to write! And read. (even though I have summer school, which I deeply regret enrolling in, i only get 3 hours of summer school a day). What do you all think?

Sylveevee I really liked Chapter 15! The fight between the Rockwell Tentacle and Queen Syl was very cool, even though it was kind of short. But I don’t think it’s the end just yet, it was just one tentacle. I wonder who would win between the two. Would Queen Syl be able to transform into Rockwell? I don’t think so, right? Rockwell is a human mutated by element, so it isn’t its own species. I think that’s how the logic works.

And justice is finally delivered to Milo. That guy deserves to die for experimenting on so many people with Doctor Bubba.

I also feel very bad for Sunhigh. I hope he gets the protection necessary before he gets his powers so he can defend himself on his own. Anyway, I have a few ideas you can explore in your story, since I think it’d be good for your story:

Pat: I think Pat can get more character development. Right now, he is trying his hardest to take his revenge and kill Queen Syl. He always ends up failing. But what if he teamed up with other people? Or maybe what if he learns to move on and forgive Syl? After all their feud began because they argued about whether or not the brainwashed enemies should get to stay in the kingdom. Pat only wanted them to begone for Syl’s safety. Maybe deep down he wants things to go back to how they used to be. Or, he’s too stubborn for that.

Moonhigh and Sunhigh: The two orphaned children had their home and parents taken away from them by the rebel raiders. Their feelings on the topic could be explored and that could develop their characters. Maybe they can feel sad, traumatized, or even angry at the rebel raiders and wish vengeance. This exploration on the characters could set it up well for introducing their hidden powers.

King Draco, the king of the other kingdom, can be explored in more detail. His backstory and why he has visions of Sylveevee would be very cool.

Cooper and Drake: Two of Queen Syl's most loyal guards, I wish get more character development. They are henchmen at best. Cooper's character can be explored through tennis, and Drake's through his... past? Maybe also explore both of their feelings about the world.

The Prison: In one of the past chapters, when Syl and Pat still loved each other, they were captured my mysterious people and put in a cage that Syl could not use her powers in. Perhaps this could be explored. Who made the prison, why did they capture Syl and Pat?

These are just ideas. It is always a good idea to tackle on one idea at a time. I really like Queen of Aberration and your perserverance to finish your story, most writers can't even be bothered to make it past the first chapter if they don't get enough "likes".

PS: I wish I could see your gacha life characters. I bet it looks very good though!

MrDemonRealz, I really liked Chapter 4 of Ark Tales! It really built up the suspsense and I wonder who the Council members are. I wonder what the implications of Greta and Hanson not having an implant mean. I bet it's something cool. Well it's nice seeing you back, hope you stick around longer!

Sunny, Chapter 11 was so awesome! So I suppose Josephina is finally taking action into her own hands, but Jaquin seems more affected by the memory manipulation than Josephina. I think it's because Tom used his dastardly powers on Josephina more often than Jaquin. I hope Jaquin can remember. And who is in the closet?? It's probably Jay... Or maybe it's Willow trying to get back at Josephina. Hopefully she forgot all about that. Anyway, I can't wait for the next chapter.

Okay, Ill see you around!