Dododex
ARK: Survival Evolved & Ascended Companion
Tips & Strategies
Dev1: Let’s make and alien!
Dev2: You mean like, a Martian?
Dev1: No, silly! A Xenomorph!
Dev2: What about copyright?
Dev1: Who ever cared about copyright?
Dev1: Make it really big.
Dev2: Okay, what’s next?
Dev1: Make them have an insane damage reduction and also insane health.
Dev2: Uh, don’t you think that’s a bit much?
Dev1: Shut up and let me finish!
Dev1: Make it spread a bunch of annoying acid when it dies.
Dev2: Okay…
Dev1: Make it be the replacement for rexes on AB.
Dev2: I think your ravenous monster is done.
Dev1: BTW, we need to hire David Tennant.
Dev2: What could you possibly need David Tennant for?
Dev1: The boss, obviously.
Dev2: Oh no…
More Reaper Funny Tips
I think I got too attached to my Reaper. When it was born I built an entire room for it complete with a tiny makeshift crib and blue wood walls. I cherished everyday with it and when I lost it to a level 175 Crab while I was tripping out on mushrooms I invited the whole god damned server to a funeral
(Oh and afterwards we had a feast and guess what was on the menu, Crab)
- The one and only HazmatGaming209
Me: yes, I will finally stack my XP by killing this reaper queen!
Me thinking: ( she is at 1/4 heath, lemme get my magnifying glass and make sure.
(Gets really close)
Me: okay here we go
Reaper queen: Oh yes child come here I have a gift for u
Me: what did u say
Reaper queen: COME CLOSER CHILD
Me: what.. what.. WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Reaper queen: YOU WILL HAVE MY CHILD!
5 year later
Me: Honey, I’m back. OH MY GOD, COOLDUD63 HOW COULD YOU!! HOW MANY OTHER PLAYERS HAVE YOU IMPREGNATED QUEEN
Reaper queen: The entire server
10 years later
Me: queen I need the child support, we’re struggling here
Lol please up this so everybody can see, I worked hard on this, thx 4 reading